bom16-Banner-5So last year, Go Plug Yourself was one of the Best Podcasts in Montreal, as voted by you, the loyal listeners. You know what really stuck in our craw? It came in behind Serial. Now, I’m pretty sure that’s not a podcast that is produced in, or even about, Montreal.

Hey, you know what the best Asian food I’ve had this year was? It was Momofuko noodle bar. I might as well just vote that. Oh wait, that’s in Toronto. But it doesn’t matter since apparently people in Montreal don’t care about things that are actually made in Montreal, they just vote for Serial.

But I digress.

Now that I’ve  yelled at you, you should GO HERE and vote for the Best of Montreal 2016.

As always, in order for any of your votes to matter you need to vote in at least 25 categories. So, in the name of complete and total self-interest (and the interest of people who I’m personally interested in seeing succeed) I give you my 25 choices for what you should vote on in this year’s Cult Montreal Best of Montreal.

1) Best Sports Personality – Les Canadiennes de Montreal

That’s right, there’s no category for “Best Sports Team” for some reason, even though we’ve got several. But our CWHL team went to the finals this year and generally kicked ass. They should get some kind of recognition. In the form of a mention on a list in a free newspaper. They should get other recognition too, but this would be a good start.

2) Best Website – www.9to5.cc

I should not need to explain this.

3) Best Twitter – 9to5cc

Yeah, we won’t win but hey, maybe an honourable mention?

4) Best Podcast –  Go Plug Yourself / 9to5 Entertainment System

Or maybe just enter “9to5.cc Podcasts”? I dunno. Pick one or both. I am unclear on the rules for voting. Either way, we work our butts off to have one of these two shows ready for you every Thursday and we’re still going strong. Both these shows now have over 100 episodes, what the fuck is wrong with us. Go Plug Yourself’s 100th episode had multiple guests, musical interludes and free pizza. Take that Serial!

5) Best Bartender – Ram (Grumpy’s)

If only because it will be fun to bother him about it while he pretends not to care that he’s on the list.

6) Best Bar – Grumpy’s

Even though we don’t really record our podcasts there anymore, as a crew Grumpy’s has been our watering hole for like two decades or something. If Grumps makes the list it will still not serve bomb drinks of any kind and you will still get dirty looks if you are too happy or excited.

7) Best Sleazy Dive – Grumpy’s

See above.

8) Best Underground Venue – TurboHaus

The boys of Trigger Effect resurrected the Haus of awesome that was the TurboHaus above their more classy venture Loic. It has risen again and is back to kicking you in the peehole with sound.

9) Best Live Music Venue – TurboHaus

Same as above.

10) Best Live Music Venue – Miss Sugarpuss or Velvet LaTouche

This is a hard split, as we love both of these burlesque performers. But, we’ve got it on good authority that Miss Sugarpuss is retiring this year, so that might sway your vote one way or the other.

11) Best Comedy Club – ComedyWorks

Just like last year I can tell you that in no way am I forced to give you the following suggestions. Nobody is telling me to do this.

12) Best Comedian – Walter J. Lyng

He’s so scary you guys.

NDG+(24+of+24)13) Best Stand-up Comedy Night – Weekends shows at ComedyWorks.

I am not even sure this makes sense, please vote.

14) Best Band – The BCASA

2016 will (probably) mark the year these dudes break up and stop being the Greatest Band in the Universe. You should vote for them while you still came.

15) Freakiest Local Act – BATTLEWAR Live Pro Wrestling

I have no idea where local wrestling fits on this list, but it should be there somewhere. I once saw two grown man spray each other with ketchup and mustard in a staged fight about a barbecue. Freakiest Local Act should be a lock.

16) Best Drug – Ketamine

Maybe if we all vote for Ketamine we’ll be able to buy ketamine again in this goddamned city.

17) Heaviest Act – MAX POWER

If you don’t know, now you know.

18) Best Dance Company – Team Greco

Friend of the show and awesome person Holly Greco brought us the likes of “Is This Pretentious?” last year and has lots of other stuff planned in 2016. So, hurray!

19) Best Cartoonist/Comic Artist – Sophie from 9to5!

Sophie draws a comic with me in it and this should be rewarded.

20) Best Graffiti Artist Crew – A’Shop Crew

NDG is lucky enough to have two murals by these guys that I get to see nearly every day on my way to work, and they’ve got dope shit all around town. They are literally responsible for making my work days cooler. For real check them out

21) Best Comic Book Store – Astro Library

I buy most of my comics online these days, but there’s something to be said about a shop that still supports pull lists for their regular customers.

22) Best Yoga Instructor – Wes Paterson

Has he ever taught me yoga? No he hasn’t. But Wes offers pay-what-you can yoga at Burritoville and if that’s not the most punk-rock yoga thing in the world then fuck you.

23) Best Pizza – Jacob Greco

Because obviously.

24) Best Coffee (beverage) – Tunnel Esprosso

I get coffee here nearly every day, it’s delicious. It is not just because I know the owner. It is also because it is near my work!

25) Best Barber – Simon and Cousins from Frank & Oak

These dudes are the best. They cut my hair. And they’re the best.

So yeah, obviously, vote however you want, but if you don’t have 25 of your own picks, feel free to steal from my list. I promise you it’s a worthwhile vote.

Love you.

Keith does all sorts of things here on 9to5.cc, he works with the other founders on 9to5 (illustrated), co-hosts our two podcasts: The 9to5 Entertainment System and Go Plug Yourself and blogs here as The Perspicacious Geek.

 

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