9to5 (dot cc)

Day 5:
The following is a minimally edited transcript of the digital voice recording I dictated while passing through a dense horde of the walking dead as I drew close to New Bunker:

As I mentioned previously, the entire valley is packed with unyielding walking corpses, hungry for human flesh. I can’t be certain, but I would imagine that they are congregating towards the flaming remains of the small settlement I called home. Hold still you filthy fucking undead motherfucker, I will fucking kill you for a second ti-

*The next few seconds are incomprehensible, mostly due to the loud buzzing of the chainknife detaching head from neck*

-onroy has another thing coming to him if he thinks I’ll just lie down and let him walk all over me. I may not be the heir of a pre-Collapse oil empire but I have something he doesn’t have: an uncanny and unyielding eye for the truth. I will stop at nothing! Nothing I say! His lies and greed will be exposed and the life of comfort he lives from high atop the mountain of corpses and hollowed husks of humanity will be stripped away from him. A new era of peace and freedom for the good city of New Bunker!

*3 loud gunshots*

Jesus Christ that was close! I was so swept up in the concept of knocking Conroy down a peg that one of those fucking crawlers nearly got to my leg. I nearly tripped over that legless bastard- he still had a working mouth though. That would’ve been a hell of an embarrassing way to go. Where was I?

I’ve theorized that in addition to responding to the smell of fresh decay, zombies also instinctively follow one another. Where one zombie goes, so will others. A single group may actually smell the flesh; a nearby group will respond to that group and so on and so forth until thousands of zombies are all converging on a single point. It doesn’t matter if there is enough food; the fact that there is any food is enough. Is this some sort of communication? Their undead groans acting like some sort of bat sonar? Who knows? I’m not a scientist, I’m a goddamned writer.

I can’t believe that motherfucker nearly ate my leg.

I tried to circumvent the larger groups as I approached the city; now that I’m closer I am forced to walk straight into the thick of things, moving quickly through the clusters. I’ve taken the precaution of covering myself in the entrails of the undead. I smell like a special blend of rot and death, it is a small price to pay to not smell alive. A zombie is predominantly drawn to fresh death, but will still attack the living if they get close enough. It’s like a sort of evolutionary balance. If a species’, if zombies are a species, only food source was also their main predator, they wouldn’t last very long would they? They prefer fresh human meat but they somehow know we’ll put up a fight. So instead they’re drawn to the newly deceased. Covering yourself in fresh human entrails would be like approaching the Black Panther Revivalists in blackface. You’d get yours and you’d have it coming. Zombified gore on the other hand? A zombie would have to get within 2-3 feet of me to even notice I’m not one of them. Once a corpse is reanimated it seems to stop being edible. Destroy the brain, cover yourself in zombified meat and you’re suddenly incognito. Just hope and pray you don’t run into some wastelander with a full-auto looking for target practice.

I’m counting on them converging at those gunshots to thin out my actual path. If they zero in on me instead I’m most assuredly fucked. Firing that gun may have been a mistake, can’t think about that now though. Got to keep moving.

Most cities have several thousand zombies pressed against their walls 24/7. The more intelligently operated settlements have their actual entrances up to 3 or 4 miles out from the walls; small outposts that connect to the main city by underground tunnels. The zombies pile up at the walls, but coming and going is still possible. Should one of these entrances get overrun, it’s just a matter of collapsing the tunnel and the city stays safe.

Once in a while they try to deal with the hordes at the gates in one way or another, but for the most part the zombies lose interest at the same rate that they arrive, so the problem never escalates the way it did in that refuge I was involved with so many years ago. I’ve even heard tales of some cities escorting their criminals out from the city walls, and then chaining them up miles away from the city; their screams drawing the zombies from the walls by extension of the phenomenon I was just talking about.

I wouldn’t put that tactic passed Conroy. In fact, I wouldn’t put it passed Conroy to do that to anybody, criminal or not. The thought that he might do just that sort of thing to me has crossed my mind more than once. I take no comfort that he may believe that is too humane a way to kill me. He may resort to more extreme measures since he’s most certainly the type to hold a grudge.
I figure the fire and fresh meat on the other side of the hills is what’s responsible for this mass migration. Amazing really. At the speed they travel, it will take thes-

*more buzzing of the chainknife*

-t least 8 or 9 days to reach the wrecked settlement. Any non-zombified human flesh will have long since been consumed and yet still they march on. These poor soulless freaks are probably not even the ones who were attached to the walls of New Bunker. Who knows how many miles they’ve wandered for no reason? I would laugh at their stupidity if they were not directly threatening my life at this very moment.

I can see one of the entrances in the distance, so I will briefly speak aloud my thoughts on Vincent Conroy. Based on the satphone call I received two days ago he knows I’m coming. I know he’ll read this. I hope he shits himself.

Conroy, you’d better find a way to kill me soon, otherwise, you’re through. I will find and expose your secrets and take you down. Last time I made a mistake; I relied on hysteria and rabble rousing and mob tactics to try to pull you down from your ill-gotten throne. This time I will make sure the entire world knows of your corruption, when I’m through with you, you will be nothing. Humanity deserves better than to be driven before your kind and crushed for your own selfish gain.

Oh! What’s that there in the distance? A group of your lackeys pointing guns at me? How delightful. I won’t give you the satisfaction in knowing exactly how I’m about to turn these men against you Conroy, but I would imagine you will know they are no longer in your service even before this goes live. I hope it eats you up inside you evil piece of shit. First these men, then you’re city.

Gentleman! You may have heard of me, my name is Saint Brigid and I would like to tell you a little bit about the man you work for…

Fuck you Vincent.

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